A new world order.

What is friendship? A few years ago a good friend of mine gave me a refrigerator magnet that states:

“Friendship is when you know everything about someone and love them anyway.”

That seems like a good definition to me and I have embraced that concept many times especially when I have been challenged by the actions of others in my life. Having a foundation of love is a key element to enjoying the relationships I cultivate. But I think acceptance of someone can be taken one step further.

What if the refrigerator magnet stated:

“Friendship is uplifting the people and relationships in our lives through our actions towards and language”

Now I have been told in the past that I am naïve and gullible for several different reasons which are really not my concern at this point. Because no matter how naïve or gullible one might believe I am, I am going to do my best to see the best in them. Finding the beauty in another person can truly be an amazing journey of joy, laughter, admiration and inner peace.

I am 37 years old and every day I struggle with seeing the faults in this world. I see the negative news, I witness the driver cut me off on the street, I am greeted by the stoic grump at the bagel shop and the customer service rep from the bank is rude and annoyed by my inability to understand why I am getting an extra charge on my account this month. One of my closest friends tells me I am fat while another informs me that I need to get serious about my career. On some days I get so frustrated by the interactions around me that I just want to run away and be left alone. But my real frustration comes from the simple concept that I believe we as people should hold the intention to uplift another through our actions and language toward another.

I know my idea for a refrigerator magnet may sound hokey. But imagine a world in which we not only did our best to uplift our friends but we did our best to uplift everyone we come in contact with throughout the day. Smiling to the receptionist at the bank, yielding to traffic on the street, showing everyone the patience, dignity and respect that you would give yourself?

I know my ideals are lofty and I have certainly not mastered the art of living life in such a gracious and caring way. I get grumpy, moody, irritated and my feelings get hurt and I am sure I have hurt others too. But I am becoming more conscious and mindful of my actions and behaviors and doing my best to frame my life with a loving, supportive theme to the best of my ability no matter what happens around me.

So perhaps the idea of friendship meaning that you know everything about someone and you love them anyway can go beyond our inner circle of life. Perhaps we may not know everything about someone, but can’t we lift them up with our actions anyway? Can’t we acknowledge the inner beauty in another with the same ease that we see the negative? Can’t we open our eyes to see how amazing someone is and embrace that part of that, talk about that part of them, uplift the good parts in them?

I am going to do my best to embrace the beauty in others including myself.

A little lovin’ goes a long way.

Just a regular morning with a heightened awareness.

This morning I woke from slumber tangled up the softness of a puffy comforter, pillows tossed about me as if they are strategically protecting and comforting my body. Two silky black felines share the bed; Gracie and Jake anticipate mornings to compete for my attention. First it’s important that I reveal at least one of my feet from beneath the covers. Jake is a toe licker in the morning so I begin to endure his gritty tongue and smile through closed eyes as I can feel the vibration of his loud purr through the mattress springs.

Gracie is a little more aggressive in getting my attention. On this particular morning she sat just beside my neck and stared down into my eyes. I sensed her crouching down closer as her whiskers began to tickle my nose and I could feel her delicate breath caress my cheek. She is usually the morning alarm. The two personalities are very funny. Once Jake gets his fill of me which usually takes about 5 minutes he is off to start his day of slumber and play and pretty much takes care of himself. But Gracie demands my attention most days during every waking hour that I am home. It starts off in bed with a scratch behind the ears and a little pat on the bottom. Then she sits and continues to wait, just watching and waiting me for to hop out of bed and follow her to the kitchen. I made the mistake of feeding her some canned food in the mornings for a short period of time; she still keeps the faith that I will do that again some day. Even though her dish is always full of dry food she still chases me to her dish in the morning and wags her tail and talks to me anticipating, hoping, and maybe even praying for a nibble of that juicy kibble from a can. So every morning I humor her, I walk to the kitchen, I shake her bowl for her, I freshen up her water and then she eats a little. After the foundations of my feline activities are complete I tend to some pressing needs of my own which usually involves exercise. Today I slipped on my sneakers and went for a jog.

I love to jog with music in my ears and I find that with a little theme music along the way I can kick into a higher gear than just jogging in silence. Maybe some day I will enjoy the silence but the distraction and the uplifting sounds keep me focused on my path and inspire me to positive thought along the way.

Today feels like a special day though. Nearly 9 years I had a brain hemorrhage in my left frontal lobe and a stroke in my right frontal lobe. Nearly 17 years ago I completed 3 years of chemotherapy and radiation treatment for leukemia. Today as I feel my feet repetitively grip the ground an enormous sense of gratitude flows through my system. Outside of the obvious part of still being alive and having survived those experiences I felt grateful that after all these years my life finally seems to be taking some form of adult-like shape. I find myself getting more submerged in a healthy train of thought. All those negative voices that used to scorn and taunt me no longer rule my conscious thought. I find myself more often feeling gratitude than depression. I find myself not only accepting my body with all its complications but loving it and nurturing it more often than before. I notice that it has become more of a habit for me to take deep breaths when I am faced with situations that challenge me. In those deep breaths I share a moment with my Higher Power and activate the process of letting go sooner than I have in the past. Today, as I went for my jog, I felt stronger than I have in years. This day is a very powerful day so far as I look back at my history and view my experiences as stepping stones to create this wonderful life I live today.

My life may not be very adventurous, and it may not sound very exciting to most. But nearly 9 years I had a brain hemorrhage in my left frontal lobe and a stroke in my right frontal lobe. Nearly 17 years ago I completed 3 years of chemotherapy and radiation treatment for leukemia. Today it feels good to have an ordinary life. It is good to feel the pressure of the ground absorbed beneath the soles of my feet as I jog around the neighborhood. Catching my breath every few minutes with a fast-paced walk relieves my aching calves and centers my stride for my next interval of jogging; my next journey to experience life with gratitude.

As I capped off my morning ritual with making fresh juice in my Jack LaLane juiceri showering and taking my medications, I realized that my focus and attention on my health requires an uplifting perception of gratitude from where I have come. It's been easy in the past to reflect regretfully but today it feels good to be alive.

This morning I woke with two loving felines by my side vying for my attention; I felt loved and appreciated. I took a jog with two healthy legs and I experienced a great sense of peace. This was a good morning.